• me: whats your opinion on tampons
  • little brother: they're little fuzzy sticks on strings
  • me: then you are ultimately more mature than most boys
  • little brother: why
  • me: for some reason tampons are gross and taboo just cuz they go in a vagina
  • little brother: well so does a penis and boys never stop talking about those
  • me:
  • little brother:
  • me: that is a fantastic point

infiltration:

sometimes i realize there are so many things i won’t remember in 50 years like the way the sky looked this morning and all the dogs i saw today and my mom’s voice and i get so sad i never want to forget

x-cessive-bastard:

I was speaking to a friend in Gaza and he told me that his little cousin is writing her name all over her body with her markers, just in case she gets blown up and no one can identify her. She is 11 years old. 11. The psychological pain and trauma the Palestinian children go through is absolutely repulsive.

Anonyme a demandé:

you look fucking stupid in a dress, DUDE

pluckyyoungdonna:

dajo42:

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come closer one second

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little closer

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okay close enough

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i have a simple question: which of us is wearing a crown?

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that would be me.

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do you know what this crown means?

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it means i look fucking cute

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and you’re the human embodiment of a sore butt

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now as your fucking queen, i royally declare

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that i am beautiful and you are a listerine enema

Listerine enema oh my god

sherrocked:

My dad just yelled “I SWEAR I’LL CUT OFF WHAT’S LEFT OF YOUR DICK IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH MY COKE DON’T YOU DARE” and I came in the room like what the fuck and it was my dad holding up a shoe and my cat sitting by a glass of coca-cola with his paw almost touching inside of it and both of them didn’t even break eye contact with each other

can-u-not-my-wayward-son:

suspnd:

suspnd:

suspnd:

my best friend just realized 30 minutes before her curfew that she’s an hour away from home in the most dangerous part of the city alone with the buses no longer running so she calls the police to take her home i cant stop laughing

update the cop that came to pick her up is a hot 20 year old guy thats flirting with her and now im not laughing anymore

SHE FUCKING HOOKED UP WITH THE COP

fuck the police